Called to Lead and the Mini Calls that Get You There

THANK YOU SO MUCH My Friend!! You are Blessed, beyond measure, with gifts that have the ability to aid and assist in the manifestation of the prophetic visions that have been birthed into the hearts and lives of many!! #ifonlytheyknew #yourdestinyawaits #walkinyourworth

I love to write.  And because of that, I try to share said gift with others.  A while back, I'd offered my writing service as a way of making some cash as I was in between jobs, and one of my friends decided to take me up on that offer.  We had a couple of sessions, and during each of them, she expressed her appreciation for my help and for the gift of writing.  Then, after our last session, she left the above message on my Facebook wall.  Admittedly, I was blown away at such unexpected words.
For me, writing is just what I do.  It comes easily for me (for the most part), and so I think I take it for granted at times.  Then, when other people read it, they talk about how wonderful it is, and I just shrug, unsure of my talent.  I think this is true of many (if not all) of my gifts.  So then to get the message that what I did made a difference, it was a beautiful moment.  It is always good to have confirmation and affirmation of your gifts.  This can be true when you have been told otherwise or been made to feel that your overall worth is diminished.  When you don't believe in yourself, you certainly can't believe in your gifts. 
For a long time, I didn't believe in myself, and so my gifts were just something that I wasn't sure of.  Even when people told me that I had gifts, I shrugged it off.  But the more I began to believe in myself, pushing aside the opinions and boundaries and restrictions of others, the more I began to see who I was and what I had to offer.  So when I got the message on FB the other day, while I was humbled, I knew that it was confirmation of things that I have been told before. 
The take aways: don't be afraid to believe in yourself and your gifts, don't let the stereotypes and narrow-minded views of others get in the way of how you see yourself, and don't be afraid to share encouragement/appreciation, because you never know how much it can bless someone else.  It just may be the mini calling that pushes them to their next step.

"Warring in my mind - what am I here for?  Where do I fit in?  I've been searching for an answer.  Heard folks prophesy dreams in ear, wondering will they die.  I hear Your voice, Lord, saying, 'it's not a lie, vision shall come to life.'  So now I realize, I'm called to lead...."

Breaking Bad and Doing What Makes You 'You'

Yesterday morning, I was laying in the bed, attempting to have some quiet time, and it didn't seem to be clicking for me.  I couldn't get focused enough to quiet myself.  It seems that my internal situation was just all over the place.  Why is that?  Well, as I took a moment to assess where I was and feel things out, I realized that I was unsettled in myself.  With all the things that have been going on, between the employment struggles, financial concerns, transition in the church, and just life in general, I have found myself dealing with some anxieties and so focused on what was going on around me that I forgot something important - what it takes to be me.
I have always been a very internal person, because I am a hardcore introvert.  This doesn't meant that I'm anti-social; it means that the way I feel refreshed and return to my center is in solitude.  There has been quite a lot of change and transition, and it is sometimes hard to process, especially being that my processing doesn't typically happen in the moment.  I have learned to be flexible and shift with many of the changes, but at the end of the day, if I don't get back to my own center, I'm not gonna be a happy person. 
Everyone needs to feel some sense of purpose and do things that help them to feel alive.  I have recognized that there are certain things that I have to do in order to keep myself sane.  In a lot of ways I can understand some of Walt's plight.  He just wanted to feel alive and to live in such a way that affirmed who he was.  Now, I'm not at all condoning selling meth, but what I am saying is that I can understand needing to do things that speak to the core of your soul.  For Walt, it was about taking control of his life, using his brain for more than teaching chemistry to a bunch of students who weren't really concerned, and essentially wasting away before he was even diagnosed with cancer. For me, I have to write, dance, and pray.  If I can't do one or more of these things on a consistent basis in a meaningful way, I'm not much good to anyone.  I lack life and passion, which makes me both cranky and passive in life. 
So I suggest doing your own breaking bad, finding things in life help you feel at peace and find your center.  It's not enough to survive.  We have to, in my opinion, take care of ourselves and do what brings us positive energy and healing.  For my dad, it's fishing.  For my mom, it's watching "SpongeBob."  For my boo, it's video games.  Whatever you can find to help yourself relax and get back to whatever your center is, find it and do it.  You'll feel much better.